Sweet Spirit

      You don't know when or where it will happen, it just does. One minue you're daydreaming about the movie you saw last night and the next thing you know the speaker's words just grab your heart and you melt into the moment. The rush spreads to your belly and flushes through your fingers, flows up into your throat, flashes red on your cheeks and finally puddles into the corner of your eyes. Yes, the sweet spirit happens.   
       Over and over again, I especially feel it during this season when my heart turns to the Lord, baby Jesus. I felt it when I held my new grandson. His alert wide eyes reminded me from where he came and with whom he had recently seen. I felt it in testimony meeting today as brothers and sisters shared their inner most feelings of the power of Jesus Christ in their lives. I felt it in the magical Christmas hymns that we sing every year.  I treasure the memories of my own two December born babies, how their births meant so much to me. I rocked them in front of the Christmas tree and dedicated my heart to serving my children and my God.
     Yes, the sweet spirit is evident in many earthly things. The kindness of a stranger, a newborn baby, a Christmas card, a choir singing, a testimony of Christ. I hope you feel the sweet spirit of Christmas in your life this year.  And, don't forget to carry kleenex in your purse.
Sandra

Recipes of Love

Lately I've found myself surfing the internet for recipes, staring through the glass doors in the frozen food isles, purchasing cook books and trying to make cous cous taste like pasta parmesianga just to convince the other eaters in the house that you can enjoy healthy food. After taking a whole year just to loose 25lbs and saying no to half the things I've cooked, I've had it! I've traded spices for cheese, vegetables for pasta, but it's impossible to convert them. I've come to the discouraging conclusion that I'm alone in my quest for health and now I feel that if I have to plan one more meal for more than myself I will run to the nearest fast food resturant and just give in-at least I'd get tons of calories for my money. Yes, I'm sick of planning menu's and pleasing people. I want to lose 15 more pounds and right now creating menus that please everyone is not necessarily helping me win the battle of the bulge! I said to my oldest son, sure bring your friend over, my house is your house. It doesn't matter that I'm sick of cooking or wish someone else would do it for me or that I'd be just as happy with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I just don't want to think, I want to create. So I did. I thought of my third son and said, yeah, let's do mexican with red enchilada sauce! Then I thought of my youngest son and said, yeah, add the taco seasoning to the enchilada sauce and cook it with the chicken. Then I thought of my husband and his five vegetables a day quest and I chopped up some peppers and onions. Of course I thought of my guests and I made some nachos with cheese and beans. Then I thought of myself and pulled out the low carb tortillas and fat free cream cheese, chopped up some lettuce, put out a platter of grapes, cucumbers and tomatoes. Together we had a feast. Oh, did I forget the Reese's Pieces Dessert mix? Yum!

It's that time of year again, oops!  Wrong!  I'm the only one going back to school in the traditional sense.  I bought 3 new pairs of tennis shoes-I'm going to be comfortable this year!  New socks and shoes give me a lift.  I want to continue on with my active attitude and so I'm implementing little things to help me stay motivated.  Many events over the last few months in particular give cause for reflection regarding my 'new' role in the family.  With all four sons 'legal' and actively engaged in proving themselves in the world, I find my time and energy taking a new focus.  Although I didn't get a career change as hoped, I feel energized and ready for the challenges awaiting me in the coming year. I hope my poor husband can find the strength to keep up with me! 

August 7, 2011

Ode to the Hendrickson Boys….
Sandra Lee Hendrickson

My kids are going to be delighted well, actually, relieved,

When they figure out, that I figured out, they know how to fill their own needs.

It’s not that I’m jumping ship or cutting the ties,

I know I still have to fulfill my part of the deal, at least try,

I did my best to show them the way

And I hope they forgive the mistakes I made, almost every day.

Each night I pray that they come to understand,

It’s not me they should follow, but the Savior’s plan.

I’m just one of His servants who was given a task

I chose to accept the challenge and do what He asked.

I hope they’ll get that though hard, life is a treasure,

Moreover, through the chaos and trials, the love holds us together.

I hope they get I learned as much about love as they did,

And that they’ll pass it on to my grandkids.

My one hope though is that they’ll see the truth,

That the Savior’s love always shines through in the good that we do.

When Things Don't Go Your Way

I really don't have a plan for how to write this post, but I'm just going to throw myself into it and see if I can swim through the myriad of thoughts and feelings and maybe grab onto something worthwhile.  I'm still floating on the edges of realization, but feel like I should post something about the last three months.  I feel like I went through a lot of effort and trials to make some changes in my life and I was washed back up on the shore of being who I was before-So am I different?  Are the changes for the better? Do I have more self-knowledge? What am I supposed to do now?  I feel torn between feeling free to be the creative self and feeling like maybe I should do something else?  Is there something else I'm supposed to do.  I have learned more about my nature and who I am as a child of God and my relationships in my family and how I fit in the world.  But I haven't discovered the complete reason for this journey that I felt so compelled to embark on three years ago.  I'm stuck in Winter Quarters for now and will have to wait out the storm in order to progress to the promised land. 
In the meantime, I've come to truly value my friends who have stood by me during this time and listened to me as I tried to figure out what to do. I've come to understand more deeply our Father's plan for us in an eternal view and that we have to be true to our eternal natures. I've come to understand my innate abilities and possibilities more and have strengthened my 'self' by walking through the fire.  I've come to understand my husband and sons and daughter in law more through their love and support of me and their patience with me as I try to reach out and achieve my fullest potential.
There will be changes this coming school year in how I will deal with my life, my work and my creativity.  I'm definitely not stopping now, nor will I lay in bed and pull the sheets over my head just because things didn't go my way.  I never intended for things to go my way-anyway-I put these hopes in the hands of the Lord and left it for Him to help me find my way.  He must want me to be a music teacher, because I tried and failed to get out.  As I read Hebrews 12 this morning, the truth of the purpose of tests and trials was born to me. I don't have a complete understanding of this concept, but I can only share what I feel as of today.  May your journey be filled with Light and may you find Peace in your trials. Thanks for reading! Sandra
Hebrews:

1Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the ^asin which doth so easily ^bbeset us, and let us run with ^cpatience the race that is set before us,

2Looking unto Jesus the ^aauthor and ^bfinisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him ^cendured the cross, despising the ^dshame, and is set down at the right hand of the ^ethrone of God.

3For consider him that endured such ^acontradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds.

4Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, ^astriving against sin.

5And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him:

6For whom the Lord loveth he ^achasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth.

7If ye ^aendure ^bchastening, God dealeth with you as with ^csons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not?

8But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.

9Furthermore we have had ^afathers of our flesh which ^bcorrected us, and we gave them ^creverence: shall we not much rather be in ^dsubjection unto the ^eFather of ^fspirits, and live?

10For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his ^aholiness.

11Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the ^apeaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are ^bexercised thereby.

12Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the ^afeeble knees;

13And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way; but let it rather be ^ahealed. 

Ready, Aim-Action!

February was a month filled up, almost too full, of a variety of experiences that encompassed all of my physical, mental and spiritual senses. During each event I drew from my resources discovering weaknesses and strengths. Kevan's return from Argentina topped the list! Returned missionaries struggle with their own reacclamation as well as the parents.  I imagine it to be like a time traveler spinning through time and then landing in a place they've never been before. Kevan embraced the challenges and met them head on!  I'm proud of him! It takes all of our strengths to deal with change. I also ran a 10k in 1 hour and 20 mins. Then, the next weekend did a bike ride of 60 miles in a terrible dust storm-both of those challenged me physically but taught me more about my character and how I deal with problems! Keep going! Don't evaluate your effort in  the middle of a race. Think forward, good form and BREATHE!  I enjoyed a wonderful writing conference that inspired me to write more and get serious about it!  Again, mental power needed, but physical in that I have to choose to spend my time wisely. Directed a cute program at school all about "Gardens" for my second graders which tapped my physical and emotional senses. With help from my husband and Kevan's hard labor, put in our back yard, physically demanding and mental because we had to work together and communicate. I know that sounds like it should be easy, but I find communication to be difficult as everyone has their own perception of the situation and it takes time to always get everyone to the middle. But we did it and I actually enjoyed the work-it's lovely too! The family reunion last weekend was a big POW for me too. Grateful that we could all be together. Grateful for a cute little grandson who is King of the house, grateful for a lovely daughter in law who loves us for all of our weaknesses and grateful that everyone acted their age-no conflicts!  Thanks! Exhausted now from six weeks of intense demands I try hold on to the gratefulness in my heart for blessings of family, increased physical ability and deeper understanding of myself and areas I need to improve upon. Read, Aim-Action begins again. 

Sweat and Sweet Tears

 I've cried during several of the athletic events I've participated in over the last few years. I've cried tears of determination because I was struggling physically to finish a difficult hill. I've cried tears  of relief when I've finished an event. And I've cried tears of pain when I've fallen down.  But today's tears were for a jumbled mix of many different reasons. Today's race was "Ethan's Run" for heart defects. Some of my dear friends have lost babies and grandbabies to heart disease and so we made matching shirts and wore then during the race.  I cried for those parents, grandparents and families and I cried for the suffering of the little babies.  Today's race was also a celebration of my fourth son's return from his mission. I cried tears of gratitude for his safe return. Today's race celebrated my efforts to become more physically fit. I cried tears of incredulity for the 25lbs lost by sweating my guts out in many cycle classes, treadmills and floor mats. I ran a 10k in 1:20:00.  About 13 min. miles, a couple of 12 min. ones. But just so you know, I'm no crybaby!  I wish anyone who's struggling with exercise to keep going, keep trying, don't be afraid to sweat, and heavens,  don't be afraid to cry! 

Swim Suit Phobia EXPOSED

The winter season is quickly coming to a close so the triathlon goal is now set. May 7th I will brave the whole thing! Here goes nothing, cycle classes at 5:30 am T/Th, Running intervals Pilates and Yoga MWF, Sat. long bike ride or 2-3 hour work outs. Yes, I'm losing inches and a couple more pounds.  Skinny-no, tired-yes, determined-yes, afraid-freakin'out? yes, worried-no, bored-no, motivated-yes, willing to be laughed at-yes! First day in the pool after the cycling class-goal: 10 minutes of solid swimming-put on old black swim suit, black cap and hoped to NOT run into anyone. Did run into two people.  Sucked up-got in and-did it. Second time-Monday-easier...ha ha ha no one else was swimming except some (old) guy walking in the water....felt good-20 mins.  Realize I'm going to need some help. Keep trying.
On the more exciting end of things...Kevan returns home next wednesday.  Exciting, thrilled and anxious.  How long is he staying?  Just kidding. That makes four for four for the Hendricksons. Now what?

WHAT'S NEW?

I don't know about anyone else-but getting new stuff isn't necessarily all it's cracked up to be. I'm sure everyone who reads this received a new 'something' for Christmas.And now you are trying hard to find a place to put that new thing. Fortunately for me I asked for a visit from my son Scott (paid for his ticket!) and some earrings (they fit in my jewelry box) because I just bought a new house, which require tons of time organizing, cleaning, straightening, designing, configuring, calculating, purchasing...you get the idea. Don't get me wrong, my 'attitude of gratitude' is in full bloom right now, but I'm somewhat exhausted from the whole adventure.  Just getting the garage set up for two cars was a major undertaking that required the help of my sweet son Bryan's manpower-where were the rest of them? Hanging drapes was another exciting event that paid me with a huge bruise on my shin and a nice cut that won't quite heal up, but hey!  I'm lucky that I fell well and only hurt my shin, and the marks on the tub from the stepladder washed off pretty easily. Yes, I was standing on a step ladder, in the tub, using a drill, which by the way, was for the first time. Power tools are amazing! Anyway, after some drape hanging and light fixture fixing, furniture rearranging, box moving and pillow fluffing, the house is looking pretty well put together...now we just need to hang the pictures, 9 weeks to spring break!